Dead
I just want to die because I’m already dead inside
My body’s beginning to go numb with all this loss of blood
As the blade drops to the floor, out of grasp I think to myself:
“how come I waited so long to move on
From all the pain you cause?”
The pain that had already killed me.
Killed me slow but I didn’t know it. But all along I was dead.
Dead from all the neglect and abuse.
You caused me to have crazy thoughts, running through my head about the very thing I’ve just done
But in my thoughts it didn’t hurt this bad.
Now it’s getting dark and I’m getting cold, my skin is turning pale and my lips are blue.
I hate you so much, that’s why I wish you were here going through this pain. The pain you drove me to.
The pain that I will die from.
Now I’m getting stiff and the world is Dark and in my last breathe I just want to say:
“Fuck you for everything you did to me and others, hopefully someday, someone will drive you to what I am now
DEAD”

Today is a really weird day.Like it's the five year ann. of 9/11 so everyone is all sad plus a teacher (a new teacher) dies over the weekend from our school it was really sad. In a few days it will be the five month date of my parents death in April of this year. I just want to cry when i think about it. but yeah . I have a new boyfriend and he's pretty cool we haven't got to hang out really yet but we will(sometime). Hopefully wensday cuz i really want him to be around i NEED him to be around. I really do love him, but there is another guy that i sorta kinda like, and i've not only liked him longer but i've known him longer. yeah wut a mind teaser. this guy___ or this guy___ hum ?????? just a choice i'll have to make. But one that i dont want to have to make. I really like these guys and i dont want to hurt them. So i'll stay the way i am now and see from there. well that's all for now i guess cuz i'm at school and i dont know wut time the bell is going to ring so yeah. I'll post a poem when i get home. well laters ♥